Who do I want to be?…Lessons from my 3 year old son

I was listening to  a talk on my way to work this morning.  In the talk the speaker said something that hit me, and reminded me of the power that my thoughts have on my life.  She said, “What I focus on expands inside of me.” 

As I contemplated this simple thought and compared it to the principle I have been studying this week “Each moment describes who you are, and gives you the opportunity to decide if that’s who you want to be”, I realized again that I do have the opportunity to decide who I want to be in EVERY SITUATION.  What I focus on truly does expand inside of me and either assists me in deciding who I want to be or detracts me from being able to decide who I want to be.

A perfect example of this for me is my interactions with my 3 year old son.


He is the most amazing little boy and is so full of energy, passion, and enthusiasm.  The energy that he lives by sometimes wears me out and I find myself “responding” to him in anger and frustration just to try to get him to calm down and listen.  When I focus on this feeling of  frustration…I literally feel it expanding inside of me, which leads to more anger and frustration.

When my focus in on loving him, trying to match his enthusiasm and energy, and celebrating his passion for life, I find that I have more patience and understanding for him…and in turn, I notice that he responds better to me.  I love the relationship that I have with him when we are both focusing on the same thing, and again I feel the happiness and passion of this relationship expanding inside of me.

So here is what I have learned this week.  I am excited to test it out again when I get home today 🙂

  1. Pay attention to what I am focusing on, and change my focus if it isn’t supporting who I want to be
  2. Take 5 seconds before responding to a situation and ask myself, “who do I want to be, and how do I want to respond“?

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